weighty secrets | Secrets are things we give to others to keep for us.

I am a liar.

I completely lied about recent weight-loss attempts when I had to fill
out the forms at surgeon A's office. I hadn't done any regulated
weight-loss attempts in at least 10 years, but be damned if I was
going to delay my surgery just to jump through another stupid hoop.
After all the crap I had to go through to get authorized, I could work
for Sigfield and Roy any day. The insurance company never asked for
proof, nor did the surgeon - who I ended up not using.

In my head.

Many days I love what this surgery has done for me.  I date and sleep with men that would have never looked at me before.  I get a rush when they tell me I am perfect that they would never date a woman who weighs more than them.  I smile on the inside because in my head I am still 330 lbs.

I hate that what attracted you to me is no longer there.  You left me after I lost weight.  You traded me in for a larger model.